To my dear self at twenty-three, from an older you,
This is what you asked for.
All your life you have wanted to know your purpose. You desired the freedom that comes from living simply and trusting God. You prayed to become a wife and a mother. Now live it.
He added a husband to your life, and children. No one has ever been the wife and mother that you are to these people. Your family is unique. No one else is you.
No one will do it like you. God made and equipped you to be you.
Yes, your rebellious heart did damage to his creation, but in Jesus you are completely forgiven, thoroughly redeemed. He has given you a new heart. Your job now is to follow Jesus and “he will make you . . .” Trust him, learn from him, seek him, cling to him.
Just like God designed your body with a place for a child to grow and a way to provide a newborn’s first food, he will continue to equip you to tend, teach and train until your job is through. He does nothing for the purpose of frustrating you. With him, you can do what he gives you to do.
He is with you always, and following after him, you will arrive at the destination he has planned for you.
While walking by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon (who is called Peter) and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. And he said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” Immediately they left their nets and followed him.Matthew 4:18-20 ESV
Trusting doesn’t mean you do nothing. Following is a relationship. Trusting and obeying him is your contribution to the relationship, and your desire to be close to him, and your reliance on him, pleases his heart.
Just follow him. He has made and equipped you, and he will continue to.
And to my older future self, all of the above still applies.