There are a couple of things I do to make my marriage better, things I wouldn’t be interested in if I weren’t married to Jerry.
First, staring at moving images on a screen has never been my favorite pastime. I prefer doing something with my hands, like writing, straightening up the house, turning pages in a book, visiting with my parents, and playing with grandchildren.
I used to tell my kids that when I am old and housebound, then I’ll catch up on those important shows I should have seen on TV. If I feel like it.
Jerry likes taking it easy on the couch after a long day at work. I don’t spend time on the couch except when I’m sick, and when he invites me to watch something with him. Most evenings now we find a documentary or historical drama on the Web and hunker down to share some chill time.
Second, I don’t care much for hunting. Early in our marriage I asked Jerry to teach me to shoot a gun. I’ve brought home game, but I don’t enjoy sneaking around in the woods being quiet for hours on end. Sometimes I want to throw rocks, sing, explore, and talk to God out loud.
What I do enjoy is living life with my husband, so last week I tagged along with him and his buddy Leo on their hunting trip. Along with more kitchen supplies than they would have taken, I packed my Bible, my laptop, and a charger to plug into the truck.
United is our choice
“But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man . . . That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:20-24 NIV).
It was a great week. The guys pulled out before sunrise and I didn’t see them till midday. They came back to rest and eat, then headed out for another try at finding those elusive elk. When they were in camp I supported them by making some of their meals and hearing about their day.
A writer’s retreat – my special place
While they were gone I did the housekeeping (or camp keeping), read my books, explored, and wrote, relishing my time alone.
Dorcas Smucker, author and columnist for the Register-Guard, wrote about the cabin her husband built for her so she could write in a quiet place. She posted a photo of herself on her blog, a contented writer perched in her nest. Compare her photo to mine.*
The writing space my husband provided for me was quite different, and my position in the photo is harder to discern. There’s a look of deep intent on my face as I write, sitting by the heater in our tent trailer wearing nearly every stitch of clothing I brought along.
Dorcas doesn’t look like she’s having trouble staying warm, but what we are both experiencing is the much-appreciated support of our husbands, and our mutual love of writing with God.
Guess what Jerry and I did when we came home from our hunting trip? Different tasks as we unpacked, reorganized, and cleaned up. Different stories about our adventures. Different plans for the next few days. Different but together.
by Kathy Sheldon Davis
*Dorcas Smucker can be found at dorcassmucker.blogspot.com. Her books are available on Amazon.com.