Marriage Tip #4 – Keep the Fire Burning

What’s the trick to keeping your love-fire burning? Last weekend Jerry and I cut, stacked and hauled firewood to heat our home with next winter. We’ve done this most of our marriage for many reasons. One is because we’ve often had access to free firewood. Another reason is there’s nothing like wood heat when it’s freezing outside. I especially appreciate it when the electricity goes out and I know my house will still be warm.

How do we keep our love hot?

A fire is kept hot by feeding it fuel. A relationship is kept healthy by feeding it as well.  I’m no expert on everyone’s marriage, but one way I feed my love for my husband is by working alongside him.

Firewood 1987a.crop

The spring I was nine months pregnant with our second child, I stacked wood in the garage with my husband from my perch on the cement step, though my bulk made me quite slow.

Now I’m slow for a different reason—my age, but I plug away at the work anyway.

It’s rather like a dance.

Working together, reaching for the same goal, causes us to learn how the other thinks and reacts. He steps aside for me, I duck out of his way, and we learn to function more efficiently so we can dodge the chunk of wood flying to our foot. (I’ve been known to throw a few wild ones when we load up the truck.)

The same is true for our marriage. When one of us is cranky, the other has learned to not take it personally. And when a harsh word is spoken, like the wild projectile launched accidentally, we quickly forgive.

At home there are a bunch of blessings to count when we snuggle by the fire. Besides the satisfaction of getting a big job done and staying warm for another year, we rehearse the adventures we’ve stored in our memory like the many cords of firewood we’ve laid aside. I hope to let those smolder for a long time.

by Kathy Sheldon Davis

By Kathy Sheldon Davis

Kathy Sheldon Davis, contributing author of Jesus Talked to Me Today and a finalist for the Oregon Christian Writers Cascade award, lives with her husband, Jerry, in the Willamette Valley. Kathy enjoys mentoring and editing for other writers, making strangers into friends, and celebrating holidays with her extended family. She has written for Pathways—Moments with God since 2016 and posts devotionals on her blog at kathysheldondavis.com .

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